Monday started out well and ended on a very high note…but some of the in between was rough.
I was able to sow some seeds…the beauty that will soon be taking place in our garden is exciting. Both the Alyssum and Bachelor Button made their way into the soil. My yellow and red roses are blooming beautifully. Marigolds are vibrant and I see more popping up from the seeds I sowed. I even saw a few coming back from last season.
I started out with 6 okra plants and one is a total loss, which means I now have room to spread them out once I remove the lost one. All 6 cucumber are doing well. Now it’s time to make plans for a trellis…and just as the rain began, I let all of my inside babies come outside for lovely bath.
This was all before 8am…
It’s now time for meds and breakfast. Mr decided he wanted bacon…of course this meant I had to go to the market, for pork because he doesn’t like turkey bacon. Doesn’t matter that he hasn’t eaten pork since before the cancer diagnosis but I suspected this would happen sooner rather than later because of his recent request for steak. Everything in me knows that he isn’t going to eat the bacon but I head out anyway.
Orange juice, cheese grits, scrambled eggs, biscuits and the pig…and as I suspected he can’t bring himself to eat the bacon. The bacon that I went to the market to get in the rain. Let’s just say there is a certain time of the month that I’d rather not be troubled…let’s just say that menopause is hell and cramps make hell even hotter. Yet he was still asking for things…Looking lost and helpless; I lost my cool and for a solid 10 minutes there was a small explosion from within.
A useless explosion because nothing is going to change anytime soon…he is ill and life just is what it is. Me creating a scene from the wild wild west does little to help.
With that being said, I started the laundry and found myself on my Shwinn outback peddling for my life…for my sanity…for my peace as well as my husband’s healing. For life to be what it had been before this year of a nightmare began when all of sudden I glimpse the leaves of one of my sweet potatoes swaying in the wind.
I stopped peddling and started smiling as I listened to the sound of peace as the birdies spoke and silenced the pain inside of me. The disappointment left and I was reminded of a ever so peaceful life that we had shared. A memory of how my husband had given me a beautiful moment in time…of such beauty and such peace that my heart smiled.
Our first of countless trips to the mountains for his 50th birthday. When life was simple. A simple reminder that he held me close and held me down and I’ll do the same…on the good days as well as the bad.
After lunch, we both had a nap. After, I completed the days laundry and had a nice soak in the tub. I’d need to pick up his massager after 5:30 and he was going stir crazy and felt up to riding along. We left early and took the long way home. Oftentimes we find ourselves at a park or near some water for a while. We weren’t that far from where we were married, Kinsaul Park in Lynn Haven FL but the wind and the weather said otherwise so we didn’t dare. A cold is not on the agenda for him…for myself most definitely not. I’d do him no good.
As we arrived home, I eagerly showed off our one red strawberry to him…covering it back quickly so that the birds don’t get first dibs. He smiled as usual.
We made our way upstairs and I started setting up his massager but had forgotten something in the car…when I returned he was sitting back in his chair massager completely set up and on; a little smile on his face and relief in his eyes…the pain seems to sometimes be constant and to see him experiencing some relief was a good thing. After sitting for a while we then positioned it so that he could be in bed because he can’t stay on his bottom too long…he was pleased.
Dinner and a Movie…he mentioned that although Saturday Night Steak was exceptional he’d would wait on green beans once we had some from our own garden; those from the market just weren’t it. I smiled, pleased that he always prefers what I grow to anything that comes from the market.
Shortly I find myself rearranging furniture while he naps. With a medication schedule of every 4 hours, true sleep is nonexistent and the naps are much needed and a pure pleasure.
Tuesday is upon us…I finally bring all the inside babies back inside. This is all that remains in The Jungle. I can’t keep up anymore. One of my Birds of Paradise is now outside in the ground. Ferns, cactus and several other aloe plants. My little Swiss Cheese plant didn’t make it…I shed a few tears over her. The remainder of my pothos are outside in water but they will probably just end up in the ground as well. I lovely ground cover in the garden. All in all they enjoyed the rain bath and everyone is happy.
Everyone is happy except this gal. My corn plant. Missie is her name.She’s been around for about 4 years and shows out every time I sit her out. I should have known this time would be no different. She will bounce back though…she always does.
That’s how one must look at life…enjoying what you can when you can and look forward to better days. With that being said I look forward to a Wonderful Wednesday.
Blessings Abounding, Vetta